Subject: The Emotionally Intelligent Solution to Toxic People

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The Emotionally Intelligent Solution to 
Toxic People
Hi Friend

Toxic people could be anyone ~ a boss, a friend, a relative; they could be a customer, a landlord ~ the people who add stress to your life. They cause havoc to your mood and your mental state. 

 Sometimes, if you’re lucky, you can write them off, or avoid them and simply get on with your life. But if you’re related to one of these people, or they have power over your job, it’s not so easily done.
When you are Emotionally Intelligent (EI) you have the ability to handle not only your emotions, but the emotions of others. So, what can you do so that you don’t feel diminished or judged? 

 These emotionally intelligent (EI) solutions will help you:
Establish Boundaries: It doesn’t matter if your ‘buttons’ are pushed by either your boss or your sister. There are boundaries that YOU have to set. There is a difference between being nice or helpful to the detriment of jeopardizing your self-esteem. Toxic people will remain the toxic, but it’s up to you to stand firm and tell them (in a nice way) that you’ve had enough. In other words ~ you must be assertive, not aggressive.

Confidence: Toxic people know exactly how to bring you down and diminish your self-esteem, but there are techniques that teach you not to take this personally. Emotionally intelligent people KNOW that no matter what these people say, they don’t have to prove anything to these people. They don’t define themselves by anyone else, nor do they allow them to upset their world.

Rational: If there are emotional upsets or dramas around you, successful people have learned to master the art of being empathetic and even involved, but not to become part of any gossip or drama. No matter how chaotic the craziness becomes, they’ve learned the effective techniques of staying in control.

Stay focussed: Successful people have learned the techniques to balance their life and their work. The balance keeps them on their A-game. They know that ‘everything you’ve learned in kindergarten’ applies to their adult life. ☺ They have an early morning and evening routine and they keep schedules. They’re organized. Although they are not selfish, they stay focussed on what is important to them.

Take Advice: Emotionally intelligent people reach out to others to get help from family, coaches, mentors, co-workers and friends. They don’t ‘live in a bubble of denial’, or tell themselves ‘I’m a strong person, I can take it’. If something disturbs them, they’re resourceful and tap into the opinion of others, and not shoulder the burden of their problems alone.


Toxic people thrive on dramas and enjoy breaking your resolve and destroying your strength, but they don’t have to diminish you. An emotionally intelligent person understands their weaknesses, but also their strengths. 

They’re focussed and don’t become part of the ‘action’. They may not like these toxic people but they save their energy for the important things that matter in their lives.

Have you been challenged by toxic people? How have you handled it? I’d love to know.

 And if you are stuck in a situation and you've been telling yourself  'I have to do something'
 take advantage of a free ½ hr discovery session to talk things out.

 Keep in touch by email or contact me on the social sites. I'd love to hear from you
 
Never forget that you're awesome and that it's always a good thing to be a little twisted!

Fondly

Bev

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http://www.untwistyourthinking.com

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Beverley Glazer MA., ICACC., has counseled and coached thousands of clients struggling with family, career, health and addiction issues for over 25 years. Among her teachers was the founder of Rational Emotive Therapy, the legendary Dr. Albert Ellis. Bev has the unique ability to put people at ease, instilling them with confidence and providing them with the direction to overcome difficulties, and become empowered in a minimum amount of time. She is a guest speaker, writer, the former host of her own AM radio show and staff writer for the Millennial addiction website Stop-frying-your-brain.


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