Subject: 6 Bullet-proof Ways to Unmuddle Your Life

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6 Bullet-Proof Ways to Unmuddle Your Life!!
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Why are we so brilliant at complicating our lives?? Why can’t we just keep it simple? Why do we think of the worst instead of the best ~ and even worse than that, why do we predict the worst will happen and create anxiety expecting it to happen? 

 Why do we have heated discussions and arguments, for the most trivial things, and defend ourselves in long tirades, texts and emails? Why don’t we simply clarifying our feelings and concerns and give straightforward answers?
To quote Dr. Seuss “Sometimes the question is complicated and the answer is simple”, and more often than not, this is true.
True story: A client of mine was losing sleep, ruminating and worrying about what should have been an exciting trip to California for the birth of her first grandchild.

 She had been having arguments with her daughter and in one heated blowout, her daughter told her that she wanted her to come and help, but that she should book a room in a hotel. 

As we often say hurtful things in the heat of the moment, I recommended that my client not address the issue further, but no matter how much I tried to relieve her anxiety, she refused to believe it. “How can a daughter say this to a mother? She agonized. “I love her. Now that she has her husband and his family, she’s totally written me off! “ She worried so much about her departure that she was unable to book her flight. Her friends and family members would ask: ‘What are you waiting for?’. “Don’t you want to be there?’ 

Of course she did, and she felt even more guilty about not doing it, but the more she delayed the more anxiety she felt, so she did nothing.

On Monday morning, for our usual coaching call, I received this message: “Hi Bev, guess what!! I’m in Cali. Shanna delivered 2 weeks early and I flew down this weekend. I’m a proud grandmother of a beautiful baby GIRL!! And just so you know, I’m staying at the house, taking care of everyone ~ everything is absolutely perfect!! How could you have known that it would all work out??”

Simple. 

My client was so overwhelmed with the negative stories she was telling herself that she paralyzed herself with fear. However, in the heat of the moment, she had no time to think. 

 When the call came in, she did what she had to do: book a flight, pack a bag ~ and handle the situation. We drive ourselves crazy with these negative stories that we tell ourselves.

So if you’re up at night worrying, or other mental clutter prevents you from peace of mind, here are some things to remember:

1) Don’t believe everything you think! Just like the saying, ‘don’t believe everything you hear’, the same applies to what you’re thinking. You may be predicting something that won’t happen at all.

2) Stop talking badly about yourself. Ex. saying things like: I’m not very good at presentations. I know I’ll lose weight, but not for long.

3) Don’t prophesize. You never really know what will happen, so this exercise is futile. Stay present and focussed.

4) Give yourself positive affirmations: “I can do this” not “here we go again ~ another day.”

5) Start each new day as a new day. Your problems or difficulties are still there, so change the way you think about them.

6) Keep it simple. When you’re overwhelmed with decisions, household tasks, etc. Stop, sit down, take a break. You’re on overload. If you can, lie down, meditate, yoga stretches ~ shut off the technology and get away from the desk. Give yourself 15minutes to regroup and calm down. 

So when you’re overwhelmed with overload, remember ~ no blame, no shame or stories. Just get on with the job at hand and stay focussed. When you keep things simple, it’s a lot easier to work everything out out!! 
So, How do you keep your life simple? Do you have toxic people invading your thoughts? What do you do? Tell me what you do? And, when you have one of those  'I should do something about this' moments? I'd love to help you

Never forget that you're awesome and that it's always a good thing to be a little twisted! :)

Fondly

Bev


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Beverley Glazer MA., ICACC., has counseled and coached thousands of clients struggling with family, career, health and addiction issues for over 25 years. Among her teachers was the founder of Rational Emotive Therapy, the legendary Dr. Albert Ellis. Bev has the unique ability to put people at ease, instilling them with confidence and providing them with the direction to overcome difficulties, and become empowered in a minimum amount of time. She is a guest speaker, writer, the former host of her own AM radio show and staff writer for the Millennial addiction website Stop-frying-your-brain.


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